Word of Caution: Contains graphic/adult material.
Pantless Alley is derived from the accumulation of pantless events that have been witnessed in our alley or near our apartment. Following, is a brief recap of the pantless action around our apartment in the first month:
The activity that brought it all together was the homeless woman who accosted our male friend on a Thursday night at 2:00 a.m., leaving The Association. For those familiar with The Association, you are aware that one must walk up stairs to reach the sidewalk. I had the pleasure of leading the charge out of the bar. As I climbed the stairs and looked upwards, I saw a woman yelling something incoherently with her pants and underwear around her knees. As I got closer, I told her that I was not interested in what she was offering. I politely asked to her move so I could make my exit. Our male friend was not so lucky.
As I was first to exit, I did not witness the following events first hand. As I walked to the corner, suddenly, I heard and saw our male friend screaming as he ran past me to the stop light. Later, I was told that the pantless homeless woman threw herself on him and was talking about how she was on YouTube.com. Once we had gathered ourselves and discussed the situation, we realized we needed to grab a cab for another friend. That meant venturing back by the pantless woman.
By this point, she was further down the block in front of Coles. Her pants were down around her knees and her shirt was pulled up to reveal her breasts. Everyone on the street could not take their eyes off of the spectacle. The security guard from our building was attempting to talk some sense into the woman and asking her to get clothed. Obviously, he was not making much progress, as more clothing was coming off rather than going on. As he was trying to wrangle the situation, we put our friend in a cab, said goodnight and headed about 200 yards around the corner to home.
Thus, Pantless Alley was born.
Pantless Alley is derived from the accumulation of pantless events that have been witnessed in our alley or near our apartment. Following, is a brief recap of the pantless action around our apartment in the first month:
- Too many people urinating to count.
- One man defecating while I was exiting the alley in my car. I was afraid that my driver side door would become involved since he refused to cease his activities as I drove by.
- Upon exiting the alley to go to Church and State with my parents, a homeless woman was pantless and looked to be washing her pants and underwear.
- Josh witnessed our crack smoking buddies assisting one another sexually. One was smoking crack while getting a blow job by the other. Our neighbor, who also witnessed this event, commented that she has seen up to four individuals partaking in this activity all at once. I will let you ponder the logistics of that.
As I was first to exit, I did not witness the following events first hand. As I walked to the corner, suddenly, I heard and saw our male friend screaming as he ran past me to the stop light. Later, I was told that the pantless homeless woman threw herself on him and was talking about how she was on YouTube.com. Once we had gathered ourselves and discussed the situation, we realized we needed to grab a cab for another friend. That meant venturing back by the pantless woman.
By this point, she was further down the block in front of Coles. Her pants were down around her knees and her shirt was pulled up to reveal her breasts. Everyone on the street could not take their eyes off of the spectacle. The security guard from our building was attempting to talk some sense into the woman and asking her to get clothed. Obviously, he was not making much progress, as more clothing was coming off rather than going on. As he was trying to wrangle the situation, we put our friend in a cab, said goodnight and headed about 200 yards around the corner to home.
Thus, Pantless Alley was born.
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